She couldn’t legally make decisions on their behalf. The same was true for health-related decisions regarding the children. D’Silva elaborated, “It was challenging when we went for school admissions, we could only have Nicola on the form as a ‘friend’ or ‘emergency contact’. Nicola was not recognised as a legal parent of the kids. For the children, D’Silva says, it has been like a lottery win – they are loved by three parents, two mothers and a father.īut things were not easy for the family when they came to India. D’Silva and Fenton have been in a same-gender relationship for over 13 years now. Born in Mumbai and currently based in London, D’Silva raised her son and daughter with her partner, Nicola Fenton. And do you even need to marry to be a parent? Who is family?Īn advertising professional, author and entrepreneur, Raga Olga D’Silva is the mother of 23-year-old twins.
The LGBTQ+ community still doesn’t have the right to marry in India, and parenthood is out of the question for most. Otherwise, the slide is always a looming danger.
And what began as revocation of a ban must now expand to a full realisation of civil rights. How many queer parents have you come across at adoption centres, parent-teacher meetings or even eating ice cream with their children at the mall? The fight that started with de-criminalising Section 377 must not end there – it is a battle half won. But in an India that places the family at the centre of the universe, it’s strange that not all Indians get to have one. Ask Indians what matters most to them and they are likely to say, my family.